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Joke of the Day

"[At job interview] Manager: So, do you have any questions about the job? Me: Yeah, can I have it?"

"I hate how sometimes I let my guard down and then all my inmates get away."

"My friend just joined a reggae band playing the triangle, he says it's easy... All he has to do is stand at the back 'n' ting."

"[my weiner falls off my body, into the toilet] ugh mercury must be in retrograde again"

"What did the blind man say when he walked past the fish market? Hello ladies."

"No, wait. ""King"" is better. Yes, that's it for sure. ""King of the Rings."" It rhymes --Tolkien's suppressed last words"

"The Energizer Bunny was arrested this morning. Have you heard about this? Yeah, police say he was charged with battery."

"A great high-intensity workout is maintaining a neutral expression when someone tells you about a cool place to hear electronic music."

"TIFU by subscribing to the wrong subreddit Whoops, Wrong sub!"

"A scarecrow just won a Nobel prize. It was for being out-standing in his field."