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Joke of the Day
"Anyone can beat a polygraph.It doesn't even have hands."
Next Joke
"Divorce lawyers all over the world are rubbing their hands together in glee now that Twitter DM has a picture function."
"[Ventriloquist Mafia] ""Oh we have ways of making people talk."""
"How many dead baby's does it take to paint a wall? _"
"I run from my car all the way to the front door of McDonald's because fitness is a lifestyle"
"I saw an identical tweet of my joke! It was posted months before mine, so he's worse than a tweet thief; he's a time-travelling tweet thief!"
"[God creating wombats] Just roll that balloon in fur and let's call it a day."
"Yo mama so greasy she used bacon as a band-aid!"
"TIFU by ordering the wrong sandwich Whoops....wrong sub."
"If women do the splits, do men do the banana splits?"