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Joke of the Day
"Why did God give man a penis? So they'd have at least one way to shut a woman up."
Next Joke
"Quitting smoking is easy. I've done it three times now."
"Nothing terrifies me more than hearing, ""Mommy close your eyes I have a present."""
"If athletes get Athlete's Foot, what do astronauts get? Missle Toe."
"What kind of joke do you tell to a vegetarian? One they've never herbivore."
"I was banging my neighbors wife, doggy style, when her husband came home... She said, ""OH MY GOD, use the BACKDOOR!!"" I should've left at that point, but you don't get an offer like that every day..."
"Texting you back right away doesn't make me a psycho. What makes me a pyscho is watching you through your window while petting your cat."
"What kind of boats do smart people ride on? Scholar ships!"
"My friend offered me a free pole dance class. I said no. With my debt, the last thing I need to find out is that I'm great at pole dancing."
"The toilet bowl was stolen from the local police precinct last night. The cops have nothing to go on."