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Joke of the Day

"Daughter asked me, ""Dad, who is your favorite Queen?"" I said, ""Friddie Mercury"" And another one bites the dust."

"After 5 years of therapy, my therapist finally said something that brought tears to my eyes. 'No hablo ingles'"

"A nurse goes to the bank As she is about to sign her name on the deposit slip she pulls out a rectul thermometer, ""awww crap some asshole has my pen."""

"Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, this one doesn't"

"I was about make a Sodium Joke... But Na"

"Two gay men were having a few drinks One said ""Bottoms up!"" The other got topsy."

"What do you call a woman who can successfully play pool whilst balancing a glass of lager on her head? Beatrix Potter."

"[making flamingos] God: bird. Adam: got it. G: but it stand still a lot. A: ok.. G: on one leg. A: how high are you? G: make it pink."

"What does a hungry clock do? He goes back four seconds."

"There's a major at my university for Women's Studies There's one for Men's Studies too, but it's normally just called ""History"""