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Joke of the Day

"it's easy as pie! 'what does that even mean?' *pie stumbles in drunk* pie: i just had sex with the homeless guy under the bridge 'oh'"

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"Is it blowjob, blow job, or blow-job? God, I hate writing thank you letters."
"Definition of circlejerk circlejerk: What comes around goes around."
"I can confidently say I'm 150 pounds of solid sexy. Plus 40-50 of squishy stuff."
"A man on one side of a river shouts to a man standing on the other side, ""Hey, how do I get to the other side of the river? The other man responds, ""You are on the other side of the river."""
"First Michael Jackson, and now Neil Armstrong.... The world is running out of moonwalkers"
"Did you hear about the Casino that hired a Blacksmith? He who smelt it, dealt it."
"I just had sex with a 16-year-old girl on an elevator... It was wrong on so many levels."
"Call me old fashioned but I prefer women with eyebrows made out of hair"
"What is a virgin's least favorite fruit? Cantaloupe"