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Joke of the Day
"Why can't a nose be 12 inches long? Because then it would be a foot."
Next Joke
"C, E-flat, and G walk into a bar... The bartender shows them the door and says, ""Sorry, we don't serve minors."""
"I hate when people tell me to have a safe flight. Like I have a choice. It's either back home, or in a swamp. I'll try really hard to live."
"Taken 5: has anyone seen my doggie?"
"When cute black and white bears start communing with spirits, it's pandanormal."
"Its Saddam shame, the situation in the Middle East... ... it's Assad day for us all."
"My son: ""Dad what's a douche bag?"" Me: see that guy sitting with his friends wearing a Bluetooth?...."
"What do you call a manic bear? A bipolar bear."
"A good way to force people to feel whatever you're feeling is to hum in public"
"I only watch Storage Wars to see if they find my ex's body. Just kidding. I like the show. And she's buried in the woods."