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Joke of the Day

"Only ghetto people go to a family party, complain about the food and STILL take 3 plates home."

"Today is a military command: March Fourth!"

"When I went to bed last night I had 47,000 followers. Now I have 700. Did I spell something wrong?"

"Q: Which game did the cat want to play with the mouse? - A: Catch."

"There is guy who knows most of secrets of the World That guy name is Mister-Lee [Mystery]"

"I told my friend I made $600 a month selling dog shit He said: ""That's gross!"" I said: ""No, that's net."""

"I tried explaining to someone why smoking weed is bad for you. To be blunt, I don't think they were paying much attention."

"What's the difference between an attorney and a herd of buffalo? The attorney charges more."

"Why did the undercover cop pose as a waiter? So he could protect and serve."

"Why are all German cats dead? They have nein lives."