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Joke of the Day

"Why are all German cats dead? They have nein lives."

"Why don't you invite a Comcast worker to your party? Because nobody likes his company!"

"Vodka...deleting memories since...uhh..."

"Did you hear about the guy who gave Jesus bad directions? He went to hell, but at least he turned a prophet!"

"If I give my dog a toy that doesn't make an unbearably annoying noise she looks at me like I have no clue how to do anything right in life."

"Pamela Anderson turns 43 today but her tits are barely old enough to buy a drink in this city."

"What did the french say to the Nazis when they invaded ? Table for 50,000?"

"Q: Why do blondes have little holes all over their faces? A: From eating with forks."

"Welcome to the Plastic Surgery Addiction Clinic I can see a lot of new faces here tonight, and I've gotta say, I'm pretty dissapointed."

"What do you call a german who is afraid of enclosed spaces? Klaustrophobic"