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Joke of the Day

"My walk of shame is leaving a handicapped restroom stall while trying not to make eye contact with the wheelchair guy who was waiting on me."

"My black friend asked me... My black friend asked me if there was a colored printer in the library I said wtf man it's 2015 you can use whatever printer you want"

"There's a sale at the Maul Everything's half off"

"Breaking news: Cheese Factory Explosion De brie everywhere."

"Me: What are you doing in your pajamas still? 3 year old: Eating frosting. Me: Fair enough."

"If Hillary is elected..... will she only make 70% of what Obama makes?"

"Asked a tennis player about his views on Trumps 2nd Amendment gaffe ( joke ) and Omar Mateens father sitting right behind her in her rally 1. Trumps Comment: Foul 1. Hillary's: Unforced Error"

"I think Inception really hit home with me because it's basically a story about sleeping."

"I can tell so much about a person just by guessing."

"Why did Hitler commit suicide? He received the gas bill."