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Joke of the Day

"Why do potheads only steal from other potheads? Otherwise there's nothing worth toking."

"hey girl, are you my mom? cuz i'd like to kill your husband and fuck you"

"My 6 year old has already asked me 4,327 questions this morning. I'm seriously considering getting another Vasectomy just to be safe."

"I was asked who my favorite x-men was. I guess Caitlyn Jenner wasn't a good answer"

"A ninja's wife comes home to find her husband dead and exclaims... ...""no ninja no ninja no!"""

"Nothing fcuks up your Friday like realizing it's only Thursday!"

"So it is my anniversary I couldn't think of what to get her... But I finally settled on a plunger, because bitches love bringing up old shit"

"What is a Down Syndrome kid's favorite number? 321"

"What's the capital of Greece? The G"

"If you don't like being a door mat....then get off the floor"