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Joke of the Day

"Drug dealing is a great occupation because if it doesn't work out, you can always tutor children in fractions."

"Have you ever been to a store that only sells lamps? I've heard it's pretty lit."

"I almost did this stupid thing at work where I think for myself."

"Accepting water from a salesperson is a sign of weakness. *faints from dehydration*"

"How do you mail an egg? In a henvelope!"

"If u wear headphones Upside down...... will the sound be upside down too? HA!"

"Saw this advert in a window... It said ""television for sale,$1,volume stuck on full"".I thought,""I can't turn that down"""

"Why can't Chuck Norris complete forms and applications on the internet? Because he can't bring himself to click the ""submit"" button."

"Marriage. Because your shitty day doesn't have to end at work."

"When I tell jokes my friends call me a faggot but I suppose it's just because they think i'm a bundle of shticks."