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Joke of the Day

"If ex asks you to go bungee jumping remember, cord goes around feet not neck, no matter what they tell you."

"Remember when you were a kid and used to blow Bubbles? Well, Bubbles is back in town and he's looking for your number."

"Did you know that Ang Lee made Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon five years before he made Brokeback Mountain? Yeah, working title for the latter film was Crouching Cowboy, Hidden Sausage."

"10,000 worth of devices were stolen from an apple store last night. Police are hopeful that the 3 phones will be found."

"Doctor: we saved your dad but he's part owl now Son: Dad it's me Dad: *head turned 180* who Son: very funny Doctor: yeah he has amnesia too"

"I heard Iran is supposed to do well at the olympics this year They're the bomb"

"What do you call fat dubstep? Chubby wubby"

"What do you call a deer with no eyes? I have no eye deer. What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs. I still have no eye deer."

"What did the homeless men yell when they hit each other with cardboard? Pillow fight!"

"Weekends are like an ORGASM: It takes a lot to get there and when you finally do, it's over in no time!"