160230
Joke of the Day
"What do you call a blonde that dyed her hair brown? Artificial Intelligence."
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"If a tree fell on keemstar in the woods Would anyone care."
"Why do Marlboro cigarettes have white filters in America, but yellow filters in Europe? So Keith Richards can tell which continent he's in."
"What's the safest place in Dallas during a tornado? The Cowboys stadium, the only place there'll never be a touchdown"
"Why did the cannibal live on his own? He was fed up with other people."
"You've reached the Suicide Hotline. If you're clinically depressed, press 1. If you sent a tweet with a typo in it, press 2."
"Why are black people so fast? Because all the slow ones are in prison"
"The most stressful part of my day is when my 5 year old shows me what he made in Arts & Crafts and I have to guess what it is."
"A man was asked if he would rather have a new circular saw or a ladder... He chose the latter."
"Whats the last thing to go through a bugs mind as it hits the windshield of your car? Its asshole."