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Joke of the Day

"The most stressful part of my day is when my 5 year old shows me what he made in Arts & Crafts and I have to guess what it is."

"What do strippers and Hillary Clinton have in common? They rely too much on polls"

"Say what you want about paedophiles. At least they drive slow in school zones."

"What do you do if a blonde throws a pin at you? Run like hell, 'cause she's got a grenade in her mouth."

"How do you eat an Indian taco? Lift her gut."

"My 4yo just shut the bathroom door on me while I was inside and told me I was in jail. So I locked the door. I love this game."

"Why do teenage girls have groups in odd numbers? Because they can't even."

"My friend's a pyromaniac... I guess you could say he has a ""burning desire""."

"How many seconds are there in a day in Africa? Seconds? They barely get firsts!"

"I told my dad about the school shooting today I don't know why he got so worked up over picture day."