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Joke of the Day
"My gran fell asleep last night while she was eating piri piri chicken She had a cheeky nan dose"
Next Joke
"What does a pussy have in common with the mafia? One slip of the tongue, and you're in deep shit."
"*rings doorbell* hmm... not sure if it rang *waits 2 hours before ringing again so I don't seem impatient*"
"The Golden Globes are like the Oscars produced by a former Soviet republic."
"That Hamburger Helper hand guy. There's a twin out there, right? Didn't go into showbiz. Maybe an accountant or something."
"*shakes self after staring at ceiling* Sorry honey, I was just thinking about Mitt Romney"
"What did the body-builder say after his house got robbed? No whey..."
"Oh, Its October Guess we should wake up that guy from green day then"
"My girlfriend's father asked me what I do... Apparently, ""your daughter"" was not the answer he wanted to hear."
"Friends with an ex? I don't even want to be friends with my friends."