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Joke of the Day
"My sister called in a panic to say she'd dropped my kid. I didn't even know she was pregnant."
Next Joke
"Her: What brings you to speed dating? Me: I just ran out of the fancy shampoo my previous GF bought for me."
"Q: What has got four legs and an arm? - A: A Rottweiler in a playground."
"Why was the hipster wearing a scarf during the summer? He liked wearing scarves before it got cool."
"What did the little boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer."
"What do you call a picture of Simon Pegg's brother? JPEG"
"I never buy a new couch without first seeing what it looks like with five loads of laundry piled on top of it."
"I have sex daily. I mean dyslexia."
"There are two kinds of people in this world... 1. People who can count 2. People who can't 3. People who aren't good at telling jokes"
"What's the Welsh word for shearing a sheep? Foreplay"