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Joke of the Day

"I asked a beautiful Chinese girl for her number. She replied, ""Sex sex sex free sex tonight"". I said, ""Wow"". Then her friend speaks: ""She means 6663629""."

"How do you get a dog to stop humping your leg? ...pick it up and suck it's dick."

"What do you call an Italian hooker? A pastatute"

"There's nothing more disappointing for a woman than finding out a bearded guy in a flannel shirt is a hipster and not a lumberjack."

"I seriously hate it when a couple starts having an argument in front of you. They could have least waited until I got dressed and left."

"I'm the guy who invented the sandal for people with only one leg. It was a flop. Credit to 'flaggon' from sikipedia"

"What do they eat instead of ""pigs in a blanket"" in McKinney, TX? Pork in a roll. (At least I'm trying)"

"Why do women watch porn films until the end? To see if they get married."

"We always bought our cars used, this one was as black as the night- -that is, until we washed it!!!"

"What happened to Frankenstein's monster on the road? He was stopped for speeding fined $50 and dismantled for six months."