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Joke of the Day

"I was down the gym this morning, when I noticed a hole in my trainer just big enough to get my finger in... ...Anyway, she's now made a formal complaint and I'm barred for life."

"For the first time in forever, I used the term ""oopsie-daisy"". Couldnt be avoided. I mean what else do you say when you drop someone's baby?"

"Caught a taxi home last night from the market. Forgot I had no money. Thankfully the driver let me pay in cabbage"

"Why were George and Lennie sad? (Of mice and men joke) Because they ran out of Weed :D"

"Yes, I love them, Friend: You have sweet shop, don't you feel like eating? Him: Yes, I love them, but dad put all sweet counted, so I taste them and put them back..!!"

"What's the difference between a divorce and a tornado in the south? Nothing. Either way someone is going to lose a trailer"

"What do you call a gay dinosaur? Gagsalotofdong"

"Shopping for Melons My wife sent me to the supermarket with a grocery list, but when I unfolded and read it, all it said was ""melons"". I guess it was the honey dew list."

"Some asshole stole my mood ring. I'm not really sure how I feel about it."

"The greatest trick the devil ever played was offering a buy one get one free sale one day after you already purchased two at regular price."