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Joke of the Day
"Why do comedians hate noble gasses? They give no reaction."
Next Joke
"Son: what shall I go as to the Halloween party, mum? Mum: Hang your GCSE results around your neck and go as a fucking idiot, son."
"Whenever my mum tells me to budget wisely, I remind her that she spent 80 on a dog coat. And we don't even have a dog."
"Its not gay if its a three way The two other guys promised."
"Why are most Muslims broke all the time? They never understood the concept of piggy banks."
"[knock at door] Cop: open up, it's the police Me [doing an Estonian accent]: I'm not here Cop: are you in Estonia? Me: I am. I'm in Estonia"
"What did the leper say to the prostitute after their session? ""Keep the tip."""
"""It doesn't matter if you win or lose, it's how you play the game."" -Losers"
"I'm very sorry for your loss, but do you know if this funeral home has wi-fi?"
"New drinking game Take a shot everytime they ask ""Are we there yet"" I've gone through two bottles of vodka at mile 149"