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Joke of the Day

"If people smoke cigarettes, what do fish smoke? Seaweed"

"Q: What do you call a running chicken? A: Poultry in motion."

"You know what they say about not arguing with stupid... People on the outside might not be able to tell the difference, so go ahead and delete all your liberal friends on facebook."

"What did the statue say to the other statue? Hey, S-tat-ue?"

"Why did the duck get kicked out of church? Because he was using fowl language!"

"So there were these two sisters.. a blonde and a brunette. The brunette goes to her sister and says ""I just fucked a brazilian!"" The blonde replies ""You slut! How many more is that than a million?"""

"I got arrested for breaking into the Chinese restaurant. Don't worry, my attorney said that I'll probably wok."

"You hate it ""No I just didn't think we'd spend our anniversary here"" *pssss* ""What was that?!"" The bouncy castle is deflating"

"4yo has repeated one word for an hour. 6yo is ninja fighting his imaginary friend. My move to a mental asylum will be an easy transition."

"How did the muslim get cancer? By smoking a lot of fags."