158841
Joke of the Day
"Why does Dr. Pepper come in bottles? Because his wife died."
Next Joke
"The only thing worse than watching a TED Talk is doing it on Netflix so your TV thinks you like TED Talks & tries to make you watch more"
"I always say the same thing when I find out I got a new employee Works for me!"
"PARENTS: if you have an ugly child, please don't post 8 million pictures of them online. Thank you."
"Have you heard of the new successful therapy for ADHD/ADD patients? It's called Concentration camp therapy. (Sorry for untasteful reference)"
"Doctor doctor I'm manic-depressive. Calm down. Cheer up. Clam down. Cheer up. Calm"
"""Hey, let's get the guys that built the Obamacare website to update our app!"" - Twitter"
"If you light a fire for a man... He'll be warm for the whole day. If you throw a man in a fire, he'll be warm for the rest of his life."
"Did you hear that Jesus starred in a porn? it was called ""the second cumming"""
"""His arms are spaghetti, his feet are spaghetti, on stage he's spaghetti, his Mom's spaghetti."" - Eminem first draft"