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Joke of the Day
"My girlfriend told me she was retaining water and gaining weight... I told her not to sweat it."
Next Joke
"There is a new Barbie doll on the market - Fast Food Barbie ...also known as McBarbie...you want fries with that?"
"""911 what's ur emergency"" This guy's not breathing ""Did u send him ur vibes?"" Yes I been sending em ""I'm sending some too"" Okay he good now"
"[internet] if u liked this story on cows dressed as plumbers.. [me] I did [i] here's a story on panda cops [barely containing my glee] go on"
"What's green and smells like pork? Kermit the frogs finger"
"Teacher: Tomorrow There Will Be a Lecture On SUN.. student: I Will Not Be Able To Attend It Teacher: Why? student: My Mother Will Not Allow Me To Go So Far..:-)"
"What's the difference between a turkey sandwich and a ham sandwich? A turkey sandwich doesn't recognize the Armenian genocide"
"get pizza or die trying"
"My doctor wrote me a prescription for dailysex... ...but my girlfriend insists it says dyslexia."
"Why did Vader deceive everyone about his love affair with the Emperor? Because he was in Sidious."