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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the midget psychic who escaped from prison? It was a small medium at large."

"A teacher keeps on talking. Teacher: What do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested? Student: A teacher!"

"Why did the 16 year old girl get pregnant? She went to Jared."

"What do you call Batman when he skips church? Christian Bale"

"How many dwarves does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two; one to hold the bulb and the other to serve him beer until the room starts spinning."

"A woman gives the news to her husband. - My love , I'm pregnant . What would you like it to be ? - A joke?."

"Who are the fastest readers in the world? [Can be disturbing] The New Yorkers. Some of them go through 110 stories in 10 seconds."

"People dont like having to bend over to get their drinks... We really need to raise the bar."

"[2 friends fighting at Denny's] Chicken: *gritting teeth* I'll have the bacon Pig: *staring down the chicken* And I'll be having the EGGS!"

"Q: What do you call a blonde with a bag of sugar on her head? A: Sweet fuck all."