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Joke of the Day

"Why are there so many Indians working with telemarketing? Because they have the biggest cow center."

"Mother to daughter advice: Cook a man a fish and you feed him for a day. But teach a man to fish and you get rid of him for the whole weekend."

"I like my coffee how I like my women Without a penis."

"I'm not doing anything cheesy for my girlfriend on valentines day... She's lactose intolerant."

"WIFE: [crying] guess what my sister just told me ME: she's a liar WIFE: are you saying her dog didn't die? ME: [wiping sweat] I love you"

"When I die My only wish is that I die in my sleep like my grandfather, not screaming and yelling for help like the passengers in his car."

"I'm okay with Rob Ford illegally using the HOV lanes... He technically counts as three people, doesn't he?"

"If I had a nickel for every gender... I'd have ten cents and a dead meme"

"What did the fish say when he ran into the wall. Dam..."

"I was going to suggest Twitter to have a live Nativity scene but I think it's going to be impossible. A virgin and 3 wise men? On here?!"