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Joke of the Day
"Friends with benefits? What, like you can provide dental insurance?"
Next Joke
"What did Groot say when he had amnesia? Am I Groot? (Credit to my 7year old son)"
"My life long dream is to open a dominatrix theme Thai restaurant called Thai Me Up."
"""The sum of the cabbage is directly proportional to the square root of the carrot divided by the mayo. That is Cole's Law."""
"""Honey, am I fat?"" ""No, not at all"" ""You're lying"" ""I swear. By the way, you got something on your chin... no, the other one"""
"What happens when a carpenter drinks with his wife? He gets hammered and she gets nailed."
"Racism is deeply embedded in our culture My mom always told me to separate whites and colored before doing laundry"
"[Chumbawumba concert] I get knocked down, but I get up again.. [whack-a-mole just goin nuts in the crowd] ""Aw hell yeah!"""
"Did you hear they are planning to legislate that all time-telling devices should indicate numbers only as Roman numerals? Not on my watch!"
"What did Hitler say when he heard that the Allies were winning? AUSCHWITZ!!!"