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Joke of the Day
"Q: Why is Clinton prone to losing his voice? A: He keeps having to eat his words."
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"What kind of money does Mario use? 8-bitcoins"
"What's the worst part about locking your keys in the car in an abortion clinic parking lot? Going inside to ask for a hanger."
"invemtor of fruit-by-the-foot: [stares blankley at a roll of toilet paper for hours] WAIT I'VE GOT IT"
"If a lawyer and an IRS agent were both drowning and you could only save one of them would you go to lunch or read the paper?"
"What do the American dollar and the American dress size have in common? Both have had to adjust for inflation."
"Why did Jesus get pulled over for drunk driving? He had a blood alcohol content of 12.00%. It's made of wine, after all."
"So a guy walks into a punchline... The punchline-tender says, ""Why the dumb joke?"""
"Some of you need to be driven out to the country and released back into the wild"
"An ideal homework excuse Teacher: Where is your homework? Pupil: My little sister ate it!"