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Joke of the Day

"Whats the difference between normal barbie and divorced barbie? The divorced barbie is $399 because it comes with Ken's house, Ken's car, Ken's furniture, etc."

"Who are the fastest readers? 9/11 victims- 100 storeys in 10 seconds"

"Seriously ppl who eat pizza with a fork & knife? This is America. We shove it in our faces like the rest of the fat people. Get it together."

"One I just made up. Did you hear about the dyslexic mafia? They all pay homage to the Dog Farther"

"How do you get down from an elephant? You don't, you get down from a duck"

"Me: I didn't get the job. Wife: Why not? M: Something about my eyesight. W: What EXACTLY did they say? M: That I needed 'adult supervision'."

"Scientists have reversed Global Warming! Get rekt, Sun!"

"Just convinced the teen up the street that he needs to change the winter air out of his tires and put in summer air. Don't do dope, kids."

"Me to waitress: ""Do you have frog legs?"" Her response: ""Yes.."" Me: ""Then hop on back to the kitchen and get me a steak"""

"What do you call a guy who always phones people? Colin."