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Joke of the Day

"What do you call it when a man screams at a woman Abuse What do you call it when a woman screams at a man Feminism"

"You know the fly was really close to being called a land... Because that's what it does half the time. RIP Mitch Hedberg"

"Reckon the first person to make popcorn by accident probably ran away for a while."

"[Safari] ""Remember, when you're near water beware of wild hippos."" Don't worry, I'm prepared for that. *shows handful of white marbles*"

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Alligator ! Alligator who ? Alligator for her birthday was a card !"

"I Farted... I farted infront of my Jewish friend and he got offended, i shrugged and said ""what? A little gas never killed anyone"""

"hey ther delilah wats it like in gotham city is the joker stil in jail-- i mean yes babe u look so prety yes u do batman is not a cool as u"

"""YOU'RE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER!"" - I yell at the McDonalds drive thru cashier after she tells me its 25 cents more for extra BBQ sauce."

"For sale: One parachute Used once, never opened."

"What do you get when you elect Bernie Sander's son as president? A son Bern"