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Joke of the Day

"What does Iraq and Bristol Palin have in common? Both of them are hard to pull out of."

"I saw a man at the beach going ""Help! Shark! Help!"" I laughed because I knew that the shark wasn't going to help him."

"My dad thought it would be a good idea to show my girlfriend my baby photos. ""You haven't changed at all."" she laughed. ""That's enough of the naked ones, please."" I told him."

"If your social security number was your cell phone number... what would your number be?"

"*Asks soulmate* What is your dream car and why? Minivan, because the sliding door <joining in> MAKES IT EASIER FOR DRIVE-BY BAZOOKA ATTACKS"

"Do all black people have a problem with slavery? Or just mine?"

"I told my wife that if she has any problems she can talk to me like she talks to her girlfriends so we're discussing why I'm such a idiot."

"What's more useless than a condom at a feminist rally? Everyone there."

"I don't want to live on in the hearts of my countrymen, I want to live on in my apartment."

"I climbed a mountain yesterday Things were looking up until I got to the summit. It was all downhill from there."