157453
Joke of the Day
"ISIS is really the worst... ... we should bomb them back to the -- whoops, never mind."
Next Joke
"Took my wife to the doctor today, to try and get her tourettes sorted Turns out that she doesn't have it, and I am actually a cunt and she wants me to fuck off"
"There's a band called 1023MB. They haven't had any gigs yet."
"""No. No birthdays, Christmas or modern medicine.. But you sure do make great friends going door-to-door"" *Door slams - Jehova's Witnesses"
"""How about a month of obligations, overspending, difficult travel and horrible weather?"" - The pitch for the month of December."
"What's better than a gold medal at the Paralympics? Working legs."
"How do you know when a joke becomes a dad joke? When the punchline becomes a parent."
"""How about if the villain is a psychopath out to make a skin suit?"" - Not in a kids movie, dude. ""Ok, but it's puppy skin?"" - Oh, then YES!"
"Every organisation is perfectly designed to get the results they are getting."
"i went to a seafood disco once... And I pulled a mussel."