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Joke of the Day

"Before I go into a job interview, I always dump Gatorade over my head so everyone knows I'm a winner."

"*reads your mind* *decides to wait for the movie*"

"They cloned a man without his permission. Was he angry? He was just beside himself."

"Two Indian junkies accidentally snorted curry powder instead of cocaine. Both are in hospital...one's in a korma.. The other's got a dodgy tikka!"

"How does a chicken do their hair? With a comb, In one fowl swoop."

"I want to be a father someday But my son says I should start now"

"I have more memory of my conception than I do of last Saturday night... though sometimes I really wish my parents hadn't done porn."

"I bet feminists hate pedestrian crossings... What with that red/green man telling them when they can and can't walk."

"My leg got amputated Me: Can I take my leg home doc.? Doc.: Why? Me: Because is my right."

"I went to the Space and Air Museum in Indiana... I paid $20 just to see an empty warehouse."