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Joke of the Day

"If you skip church on Sundays.. You're pulling a Christian Bale."

Next Joke
 
"Q. What did dela wear?(Delaware) A. Her New Jersey"
"Gifts for the family Nephew- iPod Son- iPhone Father- iPad Mother-iRon"
"How do you separate the Greek men from the Greek boys? A crowbar."
"My ex sent me a text saying ""please delete my number..."" I sent one back saying ""who's this?"""
"Just welled up with tears listening to Cheers opening theme song in case you didn't know what PMS feels like."
"SORRY I REPLACED EVERYTHING IN YOUR FIRST AID KIT WITH BAGS OF BEEF JERKY YOU MIGHT BE MAD NOW BUT YOU'LL THANK ME LATER"
"Daddy, why is grandma so bitter? I don't know, son; seems to run in the family. Your great uncle tasted awful"
"Life advice: 1.Never be afraid to say what's on your mind 2.Never be afraid to do what's on your mind 3.Don't take life advice on Twitter"
"""Why are you studying your Easter candy?"" ""I'm trying to decide which came first-the chocolate chicken or the chocolate egg!"""