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Joke of the Day

"I'll admit that the Chinese kids in math class are pretty smart... But doing it with their eyes closed... that's a bit cocky."

"Did you hear about the discount rabbi for circumcisions? He'll take up to 10% off."

"Why don't you want to eat pussy in the morning? Have you ever tried to spread a grilled cheese?"

"its 2013 and mcdonalds still doesnt serve breakfast all day"

"SON: *first word* momma. MOM: DID YOU HEAR THAT? ME: *distracted by the faint song of an ice cream truck* He never comes down our street."

"After my grandfather's funeral... I scattered his remains all over my back garden. Which was horrible, because he hadn't been cremated."

"What was the first thing the emcee said at the pornography convention? Thank you all for coming!"

"I like my sex like I like my barbeque, mesquite"

"On a scale of one to ten, guess how much I like golfing. Fore!"

"I went to the zoo this past weekend. The only animal they had was a dog... it was a shih tzu."