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Joke of the Day

"SON: *first word* momma. MOM: DID YOU HEAR THAT? ME: *distracted by the faint song of an ice cream truck* He never comes down our street."

"What's three feet long and keeps a twat warm? Donald Trump's scarf."

"All the girls I've ever kissed can agree on one thing. It's weird that I have a beak."

"What did the left pussy lip say to the right pussy lip? Girl, we used to be so tight until we let some dick come between us."

"Any woman who chooses to have sex with me, gets the short end of *that* transaction."

"When i was young my mom used to put food on the spoon.. and sing ""train is coming, train is coming""... I'd always eat cause i knew if i didn't, she wouldn't untie me from the railway line."

"They're getting rid of all our Fossil Fuels to go 100% Electric?! Oil go Volt! No votes, really? No one gets this joke, I see."

"How do you know a black woman is pregnant? When she pulls out the tampon, the cotton's been picked clean."

"left my laptop bag at a restaurant last night and today i went to pick it up and the lady asked what was inside to verify that it's mine,"

"if u switch the m&e at the end of memes it spells meems which has the same pronunciation"