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Joke of the Day
"How do you help a lemon? Lemon-aid."
Next Joke
"When are they going to pass a law making the selling of horrible guacamole punishable with death?"
"We now have tortilla chips shaped as functional shovels to minimize calories burned when scooping junk into our mouths. Your move, diabetes"
"children crying as stepdad attempts to overturn custom t-shirt mall kiosk that accidentally typed ""#2 dad"" on his photo, stepdad also crying"
"Hmm. Every fortune cookie I've opened in the past six months says ""you will die screaming."" Weird."
"Why I don't joke about politicians? Because I don't joke about jokes."
"I only hate the people in front of me. Everyone behind me is cool."
"What do you call a smiling, sober, courteous person at a bar association convention? The caterer."
"How do you drowned a hipster? Throw them in the mainstream. Edit: spelling because I'm 5"
"What's the best part about dating a Patriots fan? They don't care if you cheat."