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Joke of the Day

"As an African-American, Iam shocked at how many black holidays we have here. We have Black Friday, Black history month, whenever a Tyler Perry movie comes out, etc"

"Just had a food baby, but I'm not ready for that type of responsibility so I flushed it"

"Why couldn't the fun guy go in the elevator? There wasn't mush-room."

"HEY DUMMIES WHEN YOU SHAZAM A SONG YOU DONT HAVE TO HOLD THE PHONE UP BECAUSE ITS JUST A SONG AND SOUND GOES EVERYWHERE."

"How did Osama Bin Laden feed his kids (OC) Here comes the aeroplane..."

"My three year old just looked up at me and clear as day said, ""I'm sick of this shit."" And all I could do was nod because he is so right."

"Half of my Facebook friends are still there solely because their life is a train wreck and it's entertaining."

"Wanted to buy a 17th century European castle but I'm baroque."

"What is the United States doing to fight pedophiles? Child Obesity."

"How do you fit an elephant in a subway.... you take the s out of sub and the f out of way"