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Joke of the Day

"Wrong hole. No. Still the wrong hole. Only ONE in each hole! Ugh. Here! I'll show you. -Helping my kid put on a swimsuit."

"What's got 24 balls and screws small animals? A shotgun shell."

"Life is like toilet paper... You're either on a roll or taking shit from some asshole."

"My friend claims that he is a blacksmith But everything he makes is forged."

"I hate Simpsons posts! Because I am a family guy."

"In my past life I was a turtle... It is all slowly coming back to me."

"As a kleptomaniac, I demand my rights... And that guy's rights... And his pen..."

"What makes cows and horses so valuable? They have a lot of moo/neigh."

"It's about damn time we start talking about spontaneous combustion. It doesn't happen in a vaccuum."

"Racism at its best Eeny meeny miney moe Catch a blacky by the toe If he holler make him pay By picking cotton for a day"