155061

Joke of the Day

"No control I have no control. There is no escape. I don't even have a home. I think I should get a knew keyboard."

"News reports say a Muslim hid several Jews in a freezer at the kosher market in Paris last week I guess the oven must have been broken"

"Did you hear about the explosion in the cheese factory? The only thing left was de-brie"

"How many Emos does it take to change a light bulb? None. They prefer to cry in the dark."

"What's the difference between a lesbian and a sperm whale? Fifty pounds and a flannel shirt."

"Whats the last thing to go through a bugs mind as it hits the windshield of your car? Its asshole."

"Why are notes natural leaders? Because while a note makes a sound, the rest is silent."

"[courtroom, on witness stand] Prosecuting attny: If you think she's poisoning you, why did you eat it? Me: It was pizza [jury nods, murmurs]"

"What phrase do prostitutes and mafia members both say? You lookin to get whacked?"

"Q. What did one tornado say to the other? A. ""Let's twist again like we did last summer...."""