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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a 6 feet tall circle that recently got his diploma from college? A Graduated cylinder."

"Where can you find the best joke book in the world? The Seattle Seahawks play book. Edit: sorry for the typo."

"Back in the day I was attracted to this chick but never had enough guts to ask her out but after witnessing first hand the drama she creates on Facebook I am glad I dodged that bullet."

"If you ever trip in public... ...get up, laugh a little, and say, ""Whoops, it's been awhile since I inhabited a body."""

"What did the sign in front of the Drug Rehabilitation Center say? Keep off the grass."

"Why be fake when being real takes no effort at all?"

"Check up I went for a health check-up the other day, the doctor said, 'you've got to stop masturbating' I said, 'Why?' He said, 'Because I'm trying to examine you'."

"Who cares that Bush did 9/11? Its not that bad or particularly good. Its 82% that's a low ""B""."

"What do you call a duck that does drugs? A quack head!"

"A man asks his dog, ""Can you speak English?"" The dog replies, ""Por supuesto que puedo hombre no tonta, soy un perro!"""