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Joke of the Day

"Whats the difference between a lentil and a chikpea? I wouldn't pay 200 to have a lentil on my face"

"A woman was accused of attacking her husband with several guitars. When she got in front of the judge he asked, ""first offender?"" She replied, ""No. First a Gibson, second a Fender."""

"The dogs bark but the caravan moves on."

"What's the difference between a blowjob and a burger? Oh, you don't know? We should do lunch sometime."

"What do you call a midget with Down's Syndrome who arrives to class late? A little tardy."

"Do You Know Why The Scarecrow Won The Nobel Prize? Because he was outstanding in his field!!"

"Why don't you ever see elephants hiding up in trees? Because they're really good at it."

"Shower like nobody is watching."

"American: I was just at a shotgun wedding Me: How far pregnant was the bride? American: You English are insane Shotguns can't get pregnant"

"As my girlfriend was trying on jeans, a clerk asked her ""Need a bigger size?"" I saw the look on her face and went to make room in the trunk."