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Joke of the Day

"You wanna hear something funny? It's one of /r/jokes..!! Stranger: (/r/jokes ..? I don't even know this guy.) Stranger: /u/mustbejokingright ?"

"I just bought a pair of glasses from Zenni Optical. 20/20 would buy again."

"Told my coworker I want a dragon. He said I'm crazy for wanting anything that might set all my shit on fire but he's the one that's married."

"If I could make puppies and kittens magically appear, people would call me ""The Wizard of Awwws""."

"Why didn't Oscar Pistorius get a new bathroom door? Because his wife was dead-set against it..."

"People who hit Reply All to 20+ recipients and then say, ""Thanks!""--please know, you are going to Hell. Nothing can save you. Nothing."

"An Englishmen, a Scotsman and a Irishman went to a bar. They all had to leave because the Englishman wanted to go."

"i need a hug(e amount of cash money)"

"A hip-hop artist went to the shop to buy some cigarettes. He bought one pack for himself, and another for his hip-hop artist friend. He bought Tupac's."

"How many divorced men does it take to change a light bulb? No one knows. They never get to keep the house. Edit: Thanks for all the awesome comments. I can't keep up!"