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Joke of the Day

"""Babe there's something I've always wanted to do.."" *tenderly moves her bangs away from her eyes then scotch tapes them to her forehead*"

"I saw a guy wearing a stovepipe hat the other day... ...so I said, ""Hey! Abraham Lincoln called and he wants..."" Then I realized, they didn't have phones in the mid 1800s."

"Question and Answer Q: Did you hear about the Mexico City earthquake? A: It did $100 million worth of improvements"

"Son: Dad, I need some money! Dad: You should get a job at the StarBrites factory. Son: Why? Do they pay well? Dad: You kidding? ***You'll make a mint!***"

"Origami The World Origami Championships is today. Let's see how it unfolds."

"what did the traffic light say to the other traffic light? Don't look i'm changing"

"My friend was dating a communist He should have noticed earlier; there were a lot of red flags."

"If there is anything in this world to be happy about... Just be glad that the tastebuds are at the front end."

"My plan to reduce shark attacks. Get them hooked on meth. Getting gummed by a toothless shark probably tickles."

"A mathematician walks into a bar There are now two counters"