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Joke of the Day
"How does Porkins get into his star fighter? He has to wedge himself in."
Next Joke
"Best joke ever? my life"
"Just bought a thesaurus at the store and brought it home to find out the pages are all blank. I have no words to describe how angry I am."
"An app like Tinder that can find me episodes of Law & Order SVU I haven't seen."
"Curb stomping your enemies and having the last thing they see in their pointless lives be your Skechers lighting up >>>>"
"What sound does a Japanese camera make? ""Crick"""
"Recently, 218 Italian MPs signed a bipartisan bill for the legalization of marijuana...[x-post from r/trees] They're basically in joint support, for *joint* support. I'll show myself out."
"How to talk to a good girl and bad girl When you talk to a good girl, ask 'How are you?' When you talk to a bad girl, ask 'How much are you?'"
"Me: I don't feel well Mom: Did you eat the plastic fruit again, Gigi? Me: No Mom: ... Me: ... Mom: ... Me: *throws up plastic banana*"
"Why were the Twin Towers upset? They ordered pepperoni but they got plane"