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Joke of the Day

"How many members of Linkin Park does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, cuz in the end it doesn't even matter!!!"

"You know what they say about fast typers?[OC] They can make a girl qwert Credit: sumkid (Maria) and I"

"I just fired my liquid measurement calibration manager He had really poor litership skills."

"I pulled my cow's udder, but nothing came out. He's a milk dud."

"I don't like country music, but I don't mean to denigrate those who do. And for the people who like country music, denigrate means 'put down'."

"When I die I want my group project members to lower me into my grave so they can let me down one last time"

"They agree I'm funny I started my new job at the retirement center today. Told the residents that I'm a really funny guy. They didn't understand any of my jokes but they still pissed themselves."

"""I was born in California............ ""I was born in California."" ""Which part?"" ""All of me."""

"Can I ask you a self-referential question?"

"OMG a Matterbaby just washed up on Santa Monica beach! *""what's a matter baby?""* uh... nothing what is a matter with you?"