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Joke of the Day

"Backache Darren This is a joke I wrote before I discovered reddit. I shall link to it thusly: http://vulpes-aurum.deviantart.com/art/Backache-Darren-149248532"

"I've found out recently the worst way to start a bennefit gig for abused children is with an apology"

"My grandfather was an alcoholic but an amazing magician Whenever he wanted he could turn into a bar."

"Yeah sex is great, but have you ever rubbed your eyes for a really long time? O. M. G."

"I like my TVs like I like my women... Smart and curved."

"I'm usually exited for winter... But then I get cold feet."

"Of all the kisses I've gotten in my life. That is the first."

"What does Michael Jackson do when he gets kids to the top of the Empire State building? Tosses them off."

"My 5 year old is looking all over the house for his drumsticks but he won't have any luck finding them without a shovel."

"What is a drug addicts favorite snack? Crack-ers"