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Joke of the Day

"I bought a guide on the internet on how to be a thief 3 months ago I Haven't received it yet.."

"be careful when u talk baby talk to a baby becuase if u dont understand what ur saying u may acidentaly be declaring war in baby langauge"

"Despite the large variations in ambient temperature, how do warm blooded animals stay warm? By definition."

"How do you get a million dollars with a girlfriend You start with 4 million"

"What's the most confusing holiday in the hood? Kwanzaa. I don't think anyone has a clue what that holiday is."

"Stops rape every time Consent"

"WINDEX CEO: listen, I can't have you making puns anymore. EMPLOYEE: okay, I just want to make things clear-- CEO: you're fired."

"Venus Williams has blamed her first round exit at Wimbledon to the balls not bouncing correctly. May I suggest for her to try some better fitting underwear?"

"How many hipsters does it take to screw in a light bulb? It's an obscure number, you wouldn't know it."

"If you crossed two cows with a flock of ducks what would you get? Milk and quackers!"