15242

Joke of the Day

"""Man cave"" - Russian who has yet to get a full grip on our language, except mostly slang terms, describing the end of a couple's argument"

"What idiot named it a mugshot instead of a cellfie?"

"What do you call a guy with no shins? Tony..... toe knee"

"Money was so tight last Xmas I had to sell a kidney for gifts. And this year it's getting so bad, I may even have to sell one of my own."

"Unshakable Fact # 4 Breaking News: Condoms don't guarantee safe sex anymore. A friend of mine was wearing one when he was killed by the woman's husband."

"What does no one want but will always take Refugees"

"I just had my tubes tied, and now I'm........inconceivable."

"I hate people who take drugs. Like customs officers."

"*wife spends all morning convincing son not to be afraid of the dentist* ""Dad are you coming too?"" Hell no dentists scare the shit out of me"

"What's the difference between a blue 7 and a red 4? 3, duh. (My ex's 9 year old little sister told me this joke, and followed is up with: ""and YOU'RE the math guy!"" >_< Burned.)"