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Joke of the Day

"[First day of class at law school] *raises hand* Hi, yes. When do we get our white, curly wigs?"

"Why did the lone dolphin stop swimming? He didn't see a porpoise..."

"My dad told me that no one Really needs Heroin in thier Life I think my dad is sexist"

"What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the car? Get in the car"

"What do you feed an invisible cat? Evaporated milk."

"Just went to an emotional wedding. Even the cake was in tiers."

"Why couldn't Helen Keller vote? She was a woman! And it wasn't until 1920 when the 19th Amendment was ratified. At this point she was 40 years old and could vote."

"They call me Metal Gear Because my snake is solid"

"What did the 2 rednecks say after breaking up? Let's just be cousins."

"The head of the 2016 Somali Olympic squad has apologized to officials on behalf of their team... ...after realizing shooting and sailing were two separate events."