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Joke of the Day

"How many police officers does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They just beat the room for being black. P.S.: Sorry if repost"

"What did the Pharaohs use to keep their babies quiet? Egyptian dummies."

"I wanted to be a stand-up comedian. But i realised a sit-down comedian was more comfortable."

"[Bad joke] The other day my sister asked me what the difference between cellular division and a sock is To which I replied 'Nothing, they both involve mitosis'"

"Why did a surgeon go to prison? His medical license was doctored."

"How big are headphones going to get before we just start to wear helmets with subwoofers inside them?"

"How do you find Will Smith in a snow storm? You follow his FRESH PRINTS!"

"Being a software engineer is pretty cool because I can just stare at my screen/zone out & if anybody questions me I say I'm optimizing code"

"Q. Why do men buy electric lawn mowers? A. So they can find their way back to the house."

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Caitlin ! Caitlin who ? Caitlin you my trainers tonight I'm wearing them !"