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Joke of the Day
"why is it so hard just to get your kids to say ""bitch please"" and ""bitch thank you"""
Next Joke
"What's the best time of the day? 6:30... *hands down*"
"""I can't eat all of that!"" ... and other lies I tell"
"why don't Italians have acne? (bad joke) Because it slides off."
"First man discovered fire. Then he invented the wheel. Then there was, like, 500 years where he just kept setting the wheel on fire."
"Ladies, if you love a man, set him free. If he comes back he will be yours forever. If he doesn't, the new chick probably squirts or does anal."
"What gets easier to pick up the heavier it gets? A woman."
"Today I just turned 17! That makes me over 3.55 x 10^14 years old."
"Yo mama so fat.. she uses google plus(G+) instead of regular google"
"Sometimes, my secretary reminds me of my wife. I was unbuttoning her shirt the other day during our lunch break when she said, ""Remember, you have a wife."""